Multigenerational communities

In recent times there has been a celebration of church across the generations. Intergenerational church, intergenerational resources and intergenerational resources are flourishing. But more important than all of these is the quality of the intergenerational community – that is the topic of this blog.

This idea of generations being together is countercultural for our society. Schools are segregated by age, with different disciplines being taught by different educators. Even with a family each generation can be found on a different device consuming different content. This is a Greek model of education and this model is replicated in church: Our children and youth move to separate groups in church, learning is done with people who are of the same age as you.

In Hebrew learning people are brought together to learn from each other by doing life. Learning is immersive and relational (and often involves food). This is the Jewish model with generations learning together is a crucial part of faith development and by extension a key part of kingdom culture. Morals, values and identity are key parts of the Hebrew education.

What the Bible has to say about intergenerational communities

Old Testament

In the Old Testament we see the community being called together as a whole on many occasions. Every 7 years they were to read the law out loud in the hearing of all people, specifically so that the children would hear and learn it (Deuteronomy 31:9-13). This was not a separate catechism class for the children, but a moment for all generations to hear it together.

When Ezra was reading the book of the law, the men, women and those old enough to understand gathered together for the reading (Nehemiah 8:1-3). This does not mean the children would be left alone at home (after all, all of the men, women and those old enough to take care of them had gathered with Nehemiah). Rather it means that all people were meant to be present to their level of understanding.

And so this pattern continues that families were to gather together for the feasts in their homes, worship together and serve God together.

New Testament

This pattern continues in the New Testament. While it is not spelt out so explicitly it is implied in many moments: When Jesus needed a child as a visual aid, there was one available (Matthew 18:2). At the feeding of the 5000 families, children were present – not off in a separate programme, but part of the crowd (Matthew 14:21). Children joined in the worship of Jesus when he rode into Jerusalem, continuing the cry of Hosanna in the temple (Matthew 21:1-15) and children appear through the miracles of Jesus.

Paul writes to different categories of people, including speaking directly to children in both Ephesians and Colossians. For example, in Ephesians 6:1 he writes, ‘Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.’ He does not write, ‘Parents make sure your children obey you in the Lord.’ This would have been valid and in line with the broader understanding of parents as the primary disciplers of children. No, he expected the children to be present and listening when the letter was read out to the community.

Once you see this, it leads to the question – where else were children present, even if not specifically mentioned. For example, how many children were in the upper room on the day of Pentecost? The Bible does not tell us the answer to this. In a culture where families spent time together it would be expected that some would have been there. The disciples, some of whom were still teenagers, were certainly present. If you have only ever pictured a bunch of adults on the day of Pentecost, then maybe it is time to reflect on what an intergenerational community truly looks like.

Jesus grew up in an intergenerational community – he was greeted by Anna and Simeon in the temple, when traveling home he was part of the wider community (so much so that his parents didn’t notice he was missing for a few days).

Intergenerational community works

The starting point for this is that intergenerational community can work. If you have sat through an all age service, or breathed a sigh of relief when the children go to their groups (or you get to leave the adult service to join the children) then you may doubt this statement. But there is a clear example of where every generation benefits from such a community: The family.

In the family, parents and children live together and grow together, sharing all things among themselves as each has need. Grandparents help and support and, when it works well, every generation benefits.

There has been a shift towards this understanding as many churches seek to make their family service more impactful. The family service itself has metamorphosized into an intergenerational service (because it’s not just for families, but for people from every generation). But we could do every service as an intergenerational service and still not fulfil the richness that is shown in Scripture.

Practical thoughts

True intergenerational ministry begins not with the Sunday service, but with the community. So how can we strengthen an intergenerational community – here are 5 practical thoughts.

Five practical thoughts to move towards an intergenerational community

1.        Adopt a granny (or a grandpa)

Encourage every family with children to invite an older person for dinner one week. We’ve found this to be a great way to connect together. After we have invited an older person to our house, we love watching how they respond to our children the following Sunday and how our children are happy to see them. A quick hello and a word of encouragement enriches everyone. It can lead to significant friendships across the generations as the older generation get to know children by name and start to pray for them (and perhaps even buy them the odd treat). 

2.        Food is important

While one generation may want to run around, another generation may want to sit quietly.  The needs across the generations are different, but every generation eats. Having moments to sit around together is a natural way for generations to mix, learn and laugh together.

3.        Serve together

Where there are opportunities to serve the community, invite the children and young people to join in. Charge the older generations with the responsibility to pass on their knowledge and their faith to the younger members of the team. A member of the tech team may share how to sound check a band, but they should also be sharing how they grow with God over the years.

It’s not just practical areas where they can serve together. A  prophet may see a prophetic calling on a child and take them under their wing. An evangelist may note evangelistic fervour in a young person and encourage them in it. This is all part of encourage the mindset in the older generations to pass on what God has put in them.

4.        Share stories together

Encourage everyone to share their stories of God at work. One church I visit has an open mic moment every service where 3 people can come forward to share their testimonies from the week. Every time I have been to the church there have been three different generations represented who come forward to share.

The Psalmist writes in Psalm 145:4, ‘One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.’ Encourage the older generation to share with the younger generation what God has done. The starting point of course is to build a relationship with the younger people, to take an interest in their lives. This will cause the children to take an interest in your story.

5.        What do you think?

Opening a Bible verse and being willing to ask, ‘What do you think about this?’ is a part of growing together. Every generation, indeed every individual, will bring a different perspective to the verse that can encourage everyone. Sometimes it is the bold simplicity of a child’s interpretation of Scripture that provides the greatest challenge.

Conclusion

The sign of a strong intergenerational community is when generations mix naturally without having to be encouraged to, because they like each other. The journey to get there requires intentionality from the leadership. It's not a one way exchange - everyone benefits from being part of such a community. Studies show, children do better with grandparents in their lives, and older people stay healthier when they mix with younger people. Everyone wins!

Remember, the gold standard is not a church service that impacts every age, but a community where every member feels cared for and included as a valuable member of the community. A community where when you walk in people are pleased to see you and you are pleased to see them, irrespective of their age.  A community where our love for Jesus is at the centre of it all, uniting us together.